Five Brothers and a War

School—Kees

Kees also went to De Populier for high school. More accurately, he started at De Populier . Given the option to either follow Leen’s brilliant example, Piet’s less-than-brilliant example, or Jan’s non-event example, Kees not only followed Piet’s model but developed it into an art-form. By way of example, Kees managed to get thrown out of German class for several weeks. While hard to imagine, Kees’ attitude must have annoyed the teacher one day. In order to try to punish his uncooperative student, and likely to humiliate him by doling out a remedy normally reserved for small children, he directed Kees to go stand in the corner. The laughter in the classroom indicated that the humiliation was working. The corner Kees had to stand in had a small basin and a tap to wash hands. In his attempt not to let the teacher succeed in attacking his ego, Kees decided to make the most of it. Shortly after arriving in the corner he stood on his tippie-toes, looked over his shoulder and turned the tap on as far as it would go, with both hands on the front of the basin. Not only did it vaporize any embarrassment, it turned out to be the highlight of the day for a very appreciative audience. After having maintained that pose for about a minute, he turned around to see the class in total disarray. For effect he used his hands to imitate a cymbal player, and began enjoying the chaos it had created. The disadvantage was that his already poor German grade took another nosedive, putting yet one more nail in his educational coffin. The big lesson learned was that fun comes with a high price. He had another problem with the English teacher. That instructor was in the habit of telling very lame jokes, though is his mind he must have found them extremely funny. The students “tried” to be polite, initially chuckling after the “punch line.” To get the instructor to knock it off, the class decided to present a unified front, thereby making revenge more difficult. They decided that the next time he told a joke they would wait until he had stopped laughing. Then on a count of three, they would all shout, “HAH! HAH! HAH!” with deadpan faces. He didn’t find that acceptable, strangely enough, and became very angry. “That’s it”, he yelled, “I am never going to tell another joke to you misfits.” Spontaneous cheers broke out, accompanied with a prolonged round of applause. His mood did not improve. So far, the German and English instructors had been targeted. That left the French teacher. One day, out of the blue, the French instructor walked into the classroom and promptly told Kees to report to the principal. Kees recalls, perhaps with a rose-tinted memory, that he had just settled down in preparation for another session of serious learning. He politely asked the teacher what caused him to request such a thing, as he was unaware of any wrongdoing. Kees figured that he had not had enough time to cause mischief. The teacher tersely replied, “Because I said so!” “But, sir, this is highly unfair for you to make that request , as I am not aware of anything I supposedly did,” came the quick retort. After a few more attempts to urge Kees to obey, and Kees stubbornly wanting to know the reason, the instructor lost his patience and said, while going to leave the room, “If you will

van Pelt

Five Brothers and a War

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